Behind my smile, there’s
a concealed scar. Behind my twinkling cheerful eyes, there’s a lucid crystal
tears diffident to shed. Aside from my safe actions, there are words that are
unspoken. For every word I utter, there’s a lot of missing piece I want to
spell out. And for every work I have written, there’s so many experience I want
to share. This is me, wounded as I am but I choose to be hushed in my safe zone
for I believe, in silence, I find peace. I admit I am too enigmatic, defective,
wounded with a deep cut, hardly breathing. I am just a simple person but have
loads of imperfections. This is me, lass hiding from my shell just to avoid being
in pain. I choose to be isolated just to feel protected. But aside
from this facet of mine, I am an ordinary woman who also seeks for a blissful
life. I am wishing someday, there is that someone who would accept me for what
really I am, a man who would embrace my imperfections and lapses just to be
with me. I cannot wrap the verity that I am definitely longing for someone’s presences
that will make me feel complete. To be treated as an extraordinary and
treasured by my love. Time passes by; I will still be rigid and wait
uncomplainingly for a love that would long last, a love that would not say
goodbye and haunt me ‘till eternity. An almost perfect love is all what I need.
So odd I am thinking to have one, forgetting to ask myself, is there someone
who would love me the way I wanted? I guess, too idealistic because only God
could make me feel that way. Me as a wounded creature, feeling so lost yet wishing
one thing, and that is absolute “happiness” so I will be whole.
